Cheating

11 January 2022

I woke up 

and didn't find you besides on the bed

I wondered these days

Where have you been?


Are my worst nightmares

Coming true?

Are you really going behind my back?


Did I do something wrong?

Did you not like my song?

Did I not tell you I loved you?

Was my love not true?


These days when you say

I love you back

It’s not the same 

Feels like you are holding back


I wish I knew what was going on

In that wicked head of yours 

I wish you would be honest

And I wouldn’t have to look for signs of war


You are barely home anytime

You say it’s work

But I know all of that too well

This never happened before


You leave early morning

You come late at night

You smile like I have never seen or known

I find you always staring at your phone


Date nights feel like a chore

You just fulfilling your obligation

Just tell me the truth

What is going on?


Is there someone else

Tell me what did I do 

To deserve this hell 


I am paranoid, I panic

I eavesdrop, I check your phone

Trust me I was never like this before

You have turned me into 

someone who follows you 

to work


A sociopath, in love with you

Only ever wanted the truth

And then I find you kissing

Like I have never seen you kiss before


And all of my nightmares

Have suddenly come true

The floor beneath me has escaped

And I am standing in the shadow

Of fear and regret

What did I do 

to deserve this betrayal?


I just wanna run to you

And ask you why

But I also just wanna go home

And cry

I don’t understand the what or why

And you will feel the pain 

I don’t know if I will survive


I don’t know if I will ever love again

Not the way I loved you

Coz it was too special

I promise I will do better 

For myself, I will one day love again

And I won’t let one experience dictate my fate


So you can sleep on the couch tonight

Trust me this is the last goodbye

No explanation can get you out this time

I am sorry but you will never find me beside

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